HOW TO KNOW YOU ARE IN LOVE

The following statements may sound weird but they carry truth:

• To love someone doesn’t necessarily mean that particular person must also love you

• To love someone is not the only factor for your happy relationship and ultimately a happy marriage.

photo from www.love-you-love-quotes.com

Love relationship may have a lot of influence on your state of freedom as a person; from being completely slave to the one you are in love with, to the state where love actually makes you enjoy your freedom.

Cases where love relationship can hinder your personal freedom include when it costs you a lot to entertain your partner, your partner has final say on your life style, where you should live, what connections you should have, and controls all money outflows- he or she actually is the custodian of all your income!

There are cases where people left school, lost their jobs, committed suicide or killed other people in the name of love!

Though love can bring so much joy, it can also bring so much disaster. Therefore, for people who are in pursuit of freedom, we can’t ignore to enquire knowledge of love affairs so that we can stay in control in the face of ‘this complicated issue’ – love.

I think the first part that makes love affairs complicated is the misunderstanding of what love is and how do you know you are in love. l

Basically, I can say love is to WISH and PERFORM actions that bring all the best possible to someone while at the same time feeling very satisfied with your wishes and actions to that particular person.

You can see from the definition above, love has nothing to do with what particular person is, that is why you find rich people in love with poor people, very educated people in love with uneducated people, etc.

Love is not lust or feeling of admiring someone. You may find a man attracted to a woman because of her beautiful body, or find a woman admiring a man because of his ability to do something, or his behaviour, and immediately thinks that is Love.

As we saw above, love is not how you want to gain from someone, but how you want someone to gain. This feeling drives you close to that particular person and makes you want to know more, want to be with that person more, not for your sake, but because knowing that person more, being close to that person will make you able to serve that person better, and above all, you have that feeling that if you don’t provide that love you are not complete.

This is why you should know that sometimes Love brings pain because you may not have the chance to fulfill what you feel to that particular person.

True love may require you to let the one you love go if that is what he or she wants. You may also need to tolerate his or her behavior which don’t seem to be fine with you, above all you may be required to forgive your loved one even that thing which to many other people may seem impossible to forgive.

BUT, not everyone who is ready to forgive, who is ready to tolerate or who cares his or her partner is in love. And that your love doesn’t guarantee that your partner will not break up with you. 

In the next posts, we will discuss how to understand signs that your partner will break up with you.

Today I leave you with the following quotes:

 

“You know it's love when all you want is that person to be happy, even if you're not part of their happiness”. Julia Roberts

“Love is the condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own”- Robert Heinlein
 

“Sometimes it's a form of love just to talk to somebody that you have nothing in common with and still be fascinated by their presence”. David Byrne

“There is no love without forgiveness, and there is no forgiveness without love”. Bryant H. McGill

“In true love the smallest distance is too great, and the greatest distance can be bridged”. Hans Nouwens

Love me when I least deserve it, because that's when I really need it. Swedish Proverb